Our identity is built upon the edges
Our truth is formed in a blizzard
I am alarmed
I am shaken
I am broken
We are transcending
I am cognizant of
beauty, essence, aliveness, humanity, joy, wonder
Does this live and breathe in my soul
Will I ever be wITH
I am wITH our persistent meanness, our disorienting disregard, calculated and systemic dehumanization of people of color and women
I am alarmed at the border and throughout the world at how we care for oUR marginalized.
And
I can be encouraged by our desire to do better, our desire to not go gently into that good night but Rage.
Our desire to seek comfort in one another, our desire to sit with one another, our desire to hold one another.
Our desire to love.
Our desire to love
knowing
that we will cause disappointment, alienation, indescribable pain, and suffering irreversible heartbreak.
We know that this life becomes exponentially expansive when we engage.
We know that change is hard,
I know that in
I swing on a pendulum
between
all knowing
and
know nothing
so terrifying I pretend it’s not there
And
live as if one side
is the only side
aN
absolute truth
Each of uS possess
in varying degrees
selfless love, self loathing, compassion, self righteousness
And
we see that in others.
We cannot see ourselves or others with perfect clarity,
only through a mosaic of sharp, cutting, sparkling, broken glass, infinite shards of grit and splendor.
Each piece contains an incredible story yet incomplete and incomprehensible without the others.
When we work on our mosaic, we bleed. When we invite others to work on our mosaic, they bleed. In this space, the divine enters, not to manage, not to fix but to celebrate.
Celebrating a new creation.
When we stop living alone and begin living together.
i becomes uS
As we travel through our days we find necessarily ourselves in routines. Routines give the necessary foundation for exploration and discovery.
Where do we find laughter? How do we wipe our tears?
What is the essence of humor? What causes its bite?
Why do we want bite? Can we move backwards?
Sideways.
I wanted to rub this itch
Fierce.
I reach and I miss. Do I reach again?
Why do I recoil?
I write these words knowing that I have failed them.
I am ashamed of my meanness, my betrayal
My decisions to put my comfort above those that I love.
Why did I lash out?
Why did I betray?
Why did I abandon?
Why
— BECAUSE —
I did not want to change.
I am blessed with privilege to do something different.
To become part of
uS
I know that uS will have me
will i live in that truth
will i live wITH
uS